Children’s Mental Health: When Parents Argue

Effects of Parents’ fight on a child’s Mental Health

3 years ago

Squabbles are given in any couple’s life. Disagreements on occasions are quite acceptable. But fighting and constant bickering could sometimes escalate into smashed jars, shattered electronics and flying cutleries across of the room. Such behaviours could negatively impact your child’s mental health and leave them scarred for life. Children in their early stages of development, observe and learn from their parents. Parents are their role models, they copy their parents’ actions, behaviours and can even feel their pain. The mental disturbance created due to these circumstances could push your child to inflict pain on animals, insects, friends or siblings. Here is a list of negative effects that your child could also be facing:

Behavioural Problems

The way a child perceives this world could be impacted by domestic disputes. As it becomes a part of their personality it can wreck their social interactions in the present as well as the future. If a child is maturing in an abusive environment they may have behavioural issues. They could resort to lying, destroying their toys or property and use foul language. Their aggression and rage could get them into trouble in school or they might even always want to dwell in silence. 

Emotional and Mental Complications

Studies show that there is a high chance of children developing Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Eating Disorders, Depression, Mood swings, Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Since a child’s mind is too underdeveloped to cope with such scenarios at home, the chances of development of mental disorders in children are high. Being a bystander of regular bickering can even set off anxiety and panic attacks.

Problems in Forming Relationships

When a child is forced to grow in an unsympathetic environment, they tend to encounter problems in forming and sustaining their relationships. Not only in their romantic relationships but also with their friends, siblings, cousins, other family members, colleagues and even strangers that they would want to communicate with. They may treat these people with hostility. They may even have trust issues about various things in life.

Eating Disorders

Eating disorders are quite common in children who are going through domestic abuse. Eating disorders could further develop in Anorexia, where the food consumed is very less than normal consumption or Bulimia, where food is excessively consumed in short periods. This may lead to obesity. These disorders can cause a lot of complications in the physiology of a growing child and pose several health problems in the future.

Substance Abuse

A child who is a member of a dysfunctional and abusive household can resort to substance use like drinking, smoking, drugs like marijuana and others. They often resort to such measures because this is a way to cope with the pain that is being inflicted on them. Since their minds are still developing, they do not yet understand the risks of long term substance use. Excessive use of this could affect the normal functioning of their brain and internal organs.

Academic performance

When your child’s mind is occupied with tensions at home, it becomes difficult to concentrate at school. They could showcase below average performance with regards to their schoolwork. The emotional stress inflicted on them could even make them physically ill quiet frequently. They may develop frequent viral infections and allergies due to the compromised immune system caused by stress. This prevents them from attending school regularly hampering their performance.

Here is a list of signs that indicate that if a child is being impacted by parental bickering

Children’s Mental Health: When Parents Argue
Abnormal Behaviour and Attention Seeking
  • Showcases abnormal behaviour
  • Fights with friends and siblings
  • Signs of depression
  • When they think that their parents are fighting because of them
  • Is mostly antisocial and does not get along with other kids at school
  • They feel insecure about themselves
  • They become quiet or start crying when they sense that their parents are arguing
  • Poor at school work as well as extra-curricular activities
  • Showcasing irresponsible behaviour to seek their parents’ attention
  • Health issues like fever, stomach ache, headache
  • Wanting to run away from home

Parents can practice certain measures to safeguard their child’s health and well-being. It’s fine to have disagreements but disrespecting your spouse in front of your child will tell them that it’s ok to do so. Avoid fighting with your significant other in front of your child. Even if you do fight educate them on resolving such conflicts. Make sure to makeup and resolve your fights when they are around. Avoid shouting, screaming, and name-calling in front of your children. Explain to your child that arguing with your significant other does not mean that you love them any lesser. Keep away from abusive language and do not ask them to choose sides. This may not seem easy at first but with a lot of patience and perseverance, you can mould and nurture your child with empathy. 

Rachana Y

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